helluvamess | [tlv] character inbox

[tlv] character inbox

"If you're hearing this then I can't be fucked answering right now or some other shit-covered fuckwich is going down on this boat so I'll get back to you when the fuck I can!"

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[The door to Blitzø's cabin looks like a typical shitty apartment door. Inside is pretty much exactly a shitty apartment. The door marked "Loona's room" does not open when tried and it appears that Blitzø himself sleeps on the couch. The walls are covered with images and drawings of horses, however every picture of Blitzø has his face scribbled over.]

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Depends. Can you teach me to use it?

No.

...[Wait. siiigh]

Yes. There's a way. Two, in fact.

Gimme. You teach me some shit, and I tell Malcolm how much you've done to help me out, deal?

AND you listen to me when I say stop. I won't have you using magic to hurt me in a way I don't permit.

And we're going to need a sympathetic warden to get you the correct tools.

Deal! What kind of tools do we need?

A special magic creature called a palisman.

The fuck? You said tools, what kind of warden fucker is going to give us a fucking animal?!

Just say you can't fucking teach me next time, dick.

Shut up! It is a tool. It's a creature carved from wood, and it will help you with magic.

Who am I gonna ask for tha--

[A long, long pause.]

Malcolm could get me one. We tell him it's so you can help teach me magic and it's us getting along and he'd buy it.

Exactly.

See, I knew there was a brain in there somewhere.

Do you want to ask him, or shall we ask him together? I suggest a united front so that he doesn't waste time verifying this between us. Plus it will do him good to see us 'getting along'.