[tlv] character inbox

[helluvamess]

"If you're hearing this then I can't be fucked answering right now or some other shit-covered fuckwich is going down on this boat so I'll get back to you when the fuck I can!"

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[The door to Blitzø's cabin looks like a typical shitty apartment door. Inside is pretty much exactly a shitty apartment. The door marked "Loona's room" does not open when tried and it appears that Blitzø himself sleeps on the couch. The walls are covered with images and drawings of horses, however every picture of Blitzø has his face scribbled over.]

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Comments

[a_titanum]

[ Florian looks to Blitzø and stands up from his desk, beckoning him over as he heads for the bed.]

May I ask you something, Blitzø?

[helluvamess]

[Uh oh. He's heard those words before and there's a tiny wince as he braces for something. Please don't let it be the "what are we?" one...]

Fine, but if it's about Trevor joining then I don't think he'll go for it.

[a_titanum]

[ His nose scrunches.]

Allfather, no. No, this is much more simple.

[ He looks to Blitzø. ]

Why is it that when I expressed the idea that I wasn't about to treat you poorly or that I happen to consider your well being important to me, you thought I was calling you... I don't know. Weak? Incompetent? Take your pick.

[ He peers a little more intently.]

Or I suppose, put more specifically: what about me gave you the idea that I wouldn't outright say something like that if that's what I thought?

...you've heard how blunt I am about Johann.

[helluvamess]

What? I don't think you mean that! [At least it's not the conversation he thought was coming, although he feels like this one could be just as bad.]

I just don't fucking need all this worrying about me shit. I'm perfectly fine and I don't need anyone to be making fucking moony eyes like there's something wrong or they're worried, like it's not normal to repress every feeling and just drink all the time instead of admitting that you're scared and you care about people and don't know how to deal with it! That's just how life is!!

[a_titanum]

And is there some reason you object to the idea that I'd like things to be better than 'normal' for you? Such as... having the ability to share those fears? Admit that ignorance and know that the person you're talking to won't make fun of you or be angry that you somehow don't 'know' these things when no one's taught them to you?

[ He's going to settle into the bed now. You can join or not. ]

You don't need it, no. Obviously you know how to survive. But one generally wants more than needs met for those one cares for, no?

[helluvamess]

Because it's not going to be better, ok? It's just not how anything works out. Hell is a shitty place where everyone is shitty to each other all the fucking time, so why try to pretend like it's not going to be like that?

[He's too agitated now to sit down and paces around the room instead, his tail occasionally lashing behind him.]

None of it's going to change and I'm not going to change, so that's why I keep saying you shouldn't fucking be here.

[a_titanum]

And I disagree.

[ He leans against the pillows. ]

Both about ambitions and your capacity to change.

I won't tell you what you have to do, but I will think what I think.